Adeus Fevereiro, despedida em grande

I am free of prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
William C. Fields

Dedicado ao meu irmão gémeo (nas pouco nobres e canibalescas qualidades que temos em comum: a vil ironia, o paspalho sarcasmo, a persistente angústia, a constante - e democrática - misantropia), homem de vísceras negras, incapaz de matar com o olhar, mas certamente capaz de incapacitar agudamente com o mesmo; o homem que ao entrar na arena poria a soluçar os gladiadores, e só a aparição daria dores de barriga e diarreias aos leões.
É tão durão que lhe era repetido o atributo (não confundir com a banda dos 80's), durão durão.
Gémeo ma non troppo.

Rui, és um bicho adorável, mas é preciso um estômago durão durão.




Não resisto, mais do senhor Fields:

Fried!
(When asked how he liked children).
Variant: I like children - properly cooked.

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once, dear. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.

I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.

When I want to play with a prick, I'll play with my own.
(Declining to play golf with someone he didn't like)

Here you have some razor blades. And now, play with them!
(When talking to some children)

I note the derogatory rumors concerning my use of alcoholic stimulants and lavish living. It is the penalty of greatness.

On his death bed, he supposedly asked his banker, "Do I have enough money to buy all the children of Philidephia a bike each?" The banker looked at his notes and said yes. Fields stayed quiet for a moment in deep thought and replied "Well Fuck'em!"

Incorrecção política com mais de 60 anos. Velha e senil, portanto.